You Can't Hold the Ocean

On being "too much" yet "never enough."

photo by Lyman Bushkovski

I know.
You can’t hold the ocean
And that’s okay
Others have tried
Crushed beneath the tidal waves
Drowned by the tide
Doesn’t mean I can stop the flood
I’ve opened the dam
Let the battering ram
Slam down the door
Ka-Blam
Gush
And tell me to hush
“Can’t you just go back to making it pretty?”

Not if I want to breathe.

Don’t worry about the water
You were never meant to hold it
As if you could mold it into
A form possible to contain
You just want to hug me

I know.

And I need to surge
Rage
Storm
Purge
I don’t know if I’ll ever be huggable again
I’ve broken the basin and let myself sprawl
It’s nice here
Letting it all
Hang like my unbound hair

You can’t uncut the cord
Can’t rewind that word
Can’t un-saw the board
Or un-unleash the horde you sent thundering down that hill

So here we are

You can’t hold back the ocean
Can’t hold it either
That’s okay
That’s not what an ocean is for.

© 2020 Hartebeast

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